Phu Quoc, Vietnam D99-100: Sao Beach, Night Market & Pepper Farm

Phu Quoc is a beautiful Vietnamese Island off the coast of Cambodia. To get to it, you can either fly (we found out later) or take an annoyingly roundabout taxi/bus/ferry trip to get there.

The currency in Vietnam is Vietnamese Dong. The exchange rate is about 21,400 dong to one US dollar. In most transactions, the vendor converts 20,000VD to 1USD to make it easy on everyone... and to make a little extra $$.

The island of Phu Quoc is large but offers little to do other than relax. The topography is similar to the beachtowns in Cambodia, and the bugs are equally huge. At any given hour, dozens of three-inch dragonflies hovered over our hotel pool.

We stayed at the gorgeous, brand-new Cottage Village. We were upgraded to a villa upon arrival (#winning) and had top-notch food and concierge service the whole time. They have a lovely pool and they let you use their bicycles for free. It was expensive- $60/night- but totally worth it.

  
The closest beach was a five-minute walk away and wasn't spectacular. Our concierge told us that on the southeast part of the island was the "most beautiful beach in Vietnam," Sao Beach. We motorbiked over an hour to this prized beach, passing places called "Phuc Dat" and "Da Phuc" (hehe). We also saw telephone poles that were merely thin stripped trees:

Sao Beach was pretty but unexceptional. We should have known- if there are t-shirts being sold that say "Sao Beach: The Most Beautiful Beach in Vietnam", it's probably a tourist trap. Sao Beach offers a few big restaurants that face the water and the parking accommodates giant tour busses. The restaurants were full and the beach filled up with school kids on a field trip about five seconds after we took the picture below. 

The water was warm and the sand was white, but the waves were rough and there were a lot of rocks, so no one was really swimming. We missed our Otres Beach! (So spoiled.)

At night we went to the Dinh Cau Night Market. They had a million pearls for sale, plus the usual night market trinkets. I read about an undercover investigator who got ripped off at various pearl farms on the island. Most of the pearls sold on Phu Quoc are freshwater pearls imported from China but sold as Phu Quoc ocean originals. The vendors show you the pearls are real (not plastic) by scratching them against mirrors or holding them up to a lighter to prove they don't melt (though these tests don't verify fresh vs. saltwater pearls). I liked a pair and negotiated from $15 down to $5. Note: If you buy earrings at this market, make sure the stems are on right and the glue isn't visible. A bunch of earrings had imperfections, but they have back-stock.

The market was very small and the variety of souvenirs wasn't great. The real reason you should visit the night market is for the seafood! There are a ton of restaurants at the back half of the market, and they have just about every kind of animal that lives in the sea. I couldn't recognize half of the crustaceans. Everything was alive, ranking 10 on the freshness meter. We had a delicious tuna steak for $6 and tuna filet for $2.50. I decided to pick out some jumbo shrimp, the only item without a price on the menu, and they charged us a suspicious $20 for five prawns. I think this was a foreigner price. Annoying.

One of Phu Quoc's main exports is pepper. We found a pepper farm not far from our hotel, and when we parked the owner immediately greeted us and gave us a tour. He walked us past rows and rows of giant pepper trees, and picked us fresh peppers to sample. I imagine his name was Peter.
  
After the tour of the farm, he showed us the drying process. They dry the peppers right on the side of the road, and it only takes three days to get from picked to kitchen-ready. It was a family affair with his wife, mom and baby at work.

  
They sold black, red and green peppers, and a variety of other pepper blends not from their shop. I truly didn't feel obligated to buy anything, but we ended up buy a lot! The seasonings were incredibly fresh, and as soon as we tasted them they were sold.
 

The rest of our stay was spent exploring. We went to a coffee shop where we had our first taste of my newest addiction: Vietnamese Coffee. I thought nothing beat Thai Iced Coffee, but it turns out that was just a gateway drug.

We ordered our iced coffees and we were instructed to wait 7 minutes while the coffee dripped through the filter into the cup. Then we added the hot coffee to the cup of ice- a big no-no with coffee at home. It was absolutely amazing! Very strong and very sweet. While we were waiting for our coffee to drip, we noticed the pedestrians looked different here:

Yeup, just like in most of the Asian countries we've visited, anything goes on the roads. 

Next stop, Ho Chi Minh City!

SUCCESS

Sihanoukville to Phu Quoc, D98

Sihanoukville --> Phu Quoc

We already had our visas from the Vietnam Consulate in Sihanoukville. It cost $60USD per person for a one-month tourist visa- by far the most expensive entry on our trip. Paolo, the owner of our hotel Carpe Diem, sets up our transportation. We pay $25 each to be picked up at Carpe Diem (in Otres), driven to the Cambodia/Vietnam border, transported to the town of Ha Tien where we will transfer to the 1PM ferry to Phu Quoc. Sounds easy enough!

6:30AM

Wake up, get ready, order breakfast...

7:00AM 

Minibus arrives EARLY (ticket says 7:30AM). Sylvia and Paolo from Carpe Diem rush to make our eggs to-go. The mini bus driver is in a hurry and he's a HUGE dick.

7:00AM-8:15AM

Pick up various passengers from Otres 1, Otres 2, Serendipity, Independence Beach and Liberty Beach. It becomes clear the bus driver is on meth-- not an exaggeration. "Yaba" is huge in Cambodia. Two pedestrians are on the side of a road and our driver slowly runs into them and laughs and drives away. He didn't know them. Weird joke.

8:15AM-10AM

The driver honks 95% of the trip. The road is two lanes, one going in either direction. Our driver honks, tailgates, sings to himself and laughs. He also texts and calls his friends and sings to them. We almost hit a PETROL truck.

10AM

We screetch to halt in front of a tourist information shop in Kampot, and the driver honks honks honks. He takes our bags out of the back. Apparently we're switching cars, though no one told us this would be the case. (In fact, we were told we had a direct bus from our hotel to the ferry terminal.) I ask him if I can go pee and he says no. I think about peeing on his seat, because I hate him, and the only reason I don't is because then I'd have to sit in wet underwear the rest of the ride. No peeing, no chatting, no dilly-dallying! We have to get in a jeep and leave RIGHT NOW. We get in the jeep with two girls who are going to Ho Chi Minh City (NOT WHERE WE WERE GOING). We double check that we're all supposed to be in the jeep, and the driver rudely says *GRUNT!*

10AM-10:45AM

New Jeep Driver is also a maniac. It's clear he hates his job and therefore hates us. No seat belts in the jeep makes for an extra fun time.

10:45AM

We get to the Cambodia/Vietnam border. The driver jumps out and gives our passports to someone and unloads our luggage. He tries to peel out, but Ian and I chase the car. I open the passenger door and Ian opens the driver door to stop him... we have some questions: IS ANOTHER DRIVER COMING TO GET US?  HOW WILL WE GET TO THE FERRY? WHERE ARE OUR PASSPORTS? WHAT THE FUCK?? Answer: Someone will come. She has your passports. *Peels away with doors not closed*  

What. Just. Happened.

10:46AM
I pee at the border casino. Sigh.

10:46AM-11:30AM

We sit and wait. A tumbleweed drifts by.

11:30AM

We're pretty convinced we were left to die... until the lady with our passports appears! Woo hoo! She tells us to walk across the border with our things. We tell her we're supposed to have someone pick us up. "Not possible." We walk.

11:45AM-12:30PM

We hand our passports to immigration. At first, we are the only people in the building. Oddly, they won't look at our passports and we don't know why; they just sit on the desk in front of the man. Ian stands in front of the counter and stares at the workers. They stare at the pens and beers on their desk. What did we miss?

Busloads of Asian tour groups start coming in in matching hats. Their passports are processed before ours. Ian goes up to the window and sees that everyone is bribing the immigration officers to take their passports. The going rate is $10pp. It's about 12:30PM, and we start to get worried- the last ferry to Phu Quoc leaves the Ha Tien Ferry Terminal at 1PM. We try to give the officer $10, but he says "Not enough for you," really leaning into the "youuuu," implying our skin color is the problem. We give him $15 and STAMP STAMP we're good to go!

See our blue passports being neglected?

12:40PM

We're freaking out. We already paid for our hotel on the island, and we're in jeopardy of missing the boat. I'm tired and frustrated and I'm holding back tears. We need to get to the ferry terminal, which is only 4 miles away. 

A taxi picks us up and five minutes later we're dropped off at a tourist agency. We show them we already paid for the ferry and they feverishly make a phone call.

12:50PM

Another taxi picks us up and takes us to the ferry. 

12:55PM
We get to the ferry!

1:30PM

Of course, the 1PM ferry doesn't leave until 1:30.

2:45PM

Arrive at Phu Quoc. Taxi to the hotel. (Taxi cost 350,000 Dong, or $18. Bus would have taken $3, but we did not want to DEAL.)

3:10PM

Arrive at our beautiful place.

Minibus with tweek #1, jeep with tweek #2, border abandonment/walk, racist holding, taxi, taxi, late ferry, taxi and... WE MADE IT!

Sounds easy enough, right?

Sihanoukville, Cambodia D86-97: Serendipity & Otres

We took a minibus from Phnom Penh to Sihanoukville for $9 per person. We asked some English blokes in the car what they paid... those suckas paid $10! We heard that others had paid $20. You'll never find the price of a transportation ticket posted unless it's a major ripoff; watch out for opportunists and know that every price is negotiable! 

The ride took about 4.5 hours on a fairly decent two-lane road. If you take this trip, know that you'll just be passing trucks and motorbikes the whole time, weaving, honking and playing leapfrog with other commuters. My advice is: don't watch!

We arrive at the "bus station" around 10PM and have to take a tuk-tuk the rest of the way to the beach. The drivers want $3 a person for a mile-long tuk, which seems insane since we just paid $9 for a 4.5 hour bus ride. The tuk drivers in Sihanoukville capitalize on the fact that the area isn't safe, and figure we're probably too dumb to know we're getting ripped off. The drivers here are part of a mafia, and they have decided that no rides will be less than $2 no matter how close the destination is. We bargain them down to $3 in total, and head to Serendipity Road. (We hear the English blokes settle for the $3 per person rate. Haggle, bros!)

Looking at Serendipity Beach from our hotel balcony on Serendipity Road

Serendipity Beach is the most populated beach in Sihanoukville. The length of the beach is lined with bars and unfancy restaurants. Touts are the worst on this beach- they are aggressive and VERY personal. Time after time a woman would approach me, ask if I'd like a massage, and when I'd say no, they'd grab my hands, look me in the eye and tell me, "When you're ready, you look for me, OK? You promised to see me, OK? Look for me, NO ONE ELSE." And if by some chance one of the ladies who already gave me this pep-talk saw another woman try to talk to me, she would approach me and yell "You already promised MEEEE!" and they would start to fight over me... though I had no intention of ever getting a massage in the first place. AVOID if you succumb to peer pressure! I literally got hissed at when I walked away.

Along with the aggressive women touts, unaccompanied children constantly roam the beaches. Some of the kids look to be as young as three years old, pounding the pavement with their siblings. The children usually travel in groups, and the leader is almost always an aggressive 14 year-old girl. One fiery pre-teen started to hassle me and I almost bought something from her out of  sheer fear. Girlfriend dealt better side-eye than Regina George herself. 

The child gangs sell braided bracelets, and they approach your personal space with more confidence than a front door Mormon (a front doorMon). They'll probably get your money even if you don't buy anything, as they're masterful pick-pockets. We felt hands on our legs and pockets as they circled around us. Grip your belongings tight. 

A few years ago I bought a bracelet from one of these kids and was immediately scolded by a hotel worker who was looking on. Buying anything from the children keeps them out of school and working on the streets. They either become criminals or victims of abuse, and the man at the hotel told me I encouraged that by buying a bracelet. I was so embarrassed.

If it hasn't come across yet- Serendipity Beach is scummy, but a good place to rage. It's sketchy during the day and completely debauched at night. The parties can be heard from inside any luxury resort even off the strip. You can buy any drug and any type of girl here.

We stayed three nights in Serendipity. The food has improved a lot in the last few years, but the prices have definitely gone up. While you can still find dorm-style rooms for as low as $5 per night (no AC or hot water, shared bathroom), you can't find as many mid-range options. You're either going to pay $5-$15 per night, or $55-75. We rewarded ourselves for living through another bout of food poising by staying in a $55/night place.

After three days we headed to Otres Beach, AKA your screensaver. It is literally what heaven must look like, minus Chris Farley and a chocolate fondue fountain.

http://www.isihanoukville.com/otres-beach4.html

 

Otres Beach is a 4km stretch of white sand and peace. It is much less developed and much, much, much quieter than Serendipity Beach. The water is clear and warm and mostly calm. The sand is soft. It's amazing. 

We stay one night (one night too many) at the "Castaways Bungalows". Upon arrival to our bungalow, we see trash left inside from the previous occupants, their towels are hung behind the door and there's even waste left in the toilet. Lucky us. We go to flush the toilet... it doesn't work. We tell the manager and he stops shooting pool just long enough to say "maybe someone come fix it tomorrow or something," completely nonchalant. He gives us "fresh"? towels and doesn't take the other ones.

The place sucked! The shower water smelled like sewage, the mosquito net had huge holes in it, and rats riffled through our stuff at night, so much so that we had to sleep with the light on.

This is a Fake Smile - Don't Stay Here

The next day we upgraded to Penguin Pablo, beautiful bungalows just a block from the beach, ran by Italian expat Stephano. The location is a downside (spoiled, I know, but it wasn't beach-front), but everything else was wonderful. It was $55 a night, outrageous for this side of the world, but at least it's clean, the bathroom works and we even had A/C.

In one of Stephano's amazing soliloquies-- for he didn't speak with you, he lovingly spoke at you-- he professed his frustration and sorrow for the future of Otres. He told us about Japanese businessmen coming to town to mark territories and plan big business ventures. He vented about it being lawless in many ways: there are no noise or building restrictions, bad quality products rejected from industrialized countries come to Cambodia, two competing Russian mafias "own" the majority of the beach town and their spats end in car bombs and shootouts, etc. He literally said "It's the wild wild west out here."

It was on Otres beach where I finally buckled to a woman tout, who ran her hand up my leg and said "Oh! So hairy!" She shamed me into getting my legs threaded. When she asked for $10 I quickly countered $8, and she instantly agreed meaning I was a sucker. IT HURT! Getting your leg hairs plucked out one by one (especially around the ankles) is something I wish on no one. I clenched my teeth the entire twenty minutes procedure  In the end, the job wasn't exactly thorough and the legs weren't very smooth. The lady was sweet, though, and gave me real pieces of aloe use on my legs to help with the burn.


After my grooming, we decide to take a dip. At first we saw what looked like clear brains scattered on the shoreline. Not impossible... Upon further inspection, we saw they were dead, washed-up jellyfish. In the water we see what looked like bits of plastic floating around us. More clear jellyfish. 

We walked farther to wade in the water in time to see a herd  of blue jellys coming our way. I saw the pack first, turned to Ian and yelled "RUN!!" and booked it out of there. The amount of jellyfish in the water could only be described as plague-like. Ian grabbed his phone and dared to re-enter to take this pic:

I looked it up and I found out we were incredibly unlucky with our timing. These herds of jellyfish make an appearance once a year: in April, the week after the full moon. We were there in that exact time frame. Needless to say, we didn't swim much that day. But I did t go home empty-handed! In the two minutes I was in the water, before seeing the jellyfish, I managed to get a little sting:

For the next few days, we rented a motorbike and spent our time between Otres and Serendipity, which are about five miles apart. In the morning we would go to Otres Beach to swim carefully around jellys and lay out, and in the heat of the afternoon we would head to Serendipity where they had a "movie theater" we could cool off in. I highly recommend  Top Cat Cinema, a set of private rooms with air conditioning, couches and a big screen monitor. They have every illegally-downloadable movie in their library and you pay by the hour. We spent many 100-degree hours in there. 

Between the beaches we see little glimpses of the towns that were built before the circus. The juxtaposition of new money and old poverty is stark and eye-opening.

New waterpark being built, surrounded by shacks

On one of our motorbike outings we saw a man and a woman fighting with another man in the street. They were fist-fighting until one man bent down and picked up a rock the size of a football and threw it at the other man's head. We didn't stick around to see how that played out. Lawless, indeed.

By the way, the cops extremely corrupt and nowhere to be found when actually needed. The only time we saw the police is while driving our motorbike. An officer walked in the middle of the road to stop us, and we find out we're essentially pulled over for being white. We're asked to "pay the fine". We ask if we did anything wrong, and he smiles and says "No, just pay the fine." We give him five dollars and we're on our way. The next time a cop tried to pull us over, Ian just drove away. They're too lazy to come after us. We do this a few more times. Just call us BRonnie & CRyde.

TL,DR: Beware of touts, children and police officers. Party in Serendipity and relax in Otres. 

Ian's Favorite Thing shadowing My Least Favorite Thing

Phnom Penh, Cambodia D79-85

Ramen Burger

You can't begin to understand Cambodia without understanding its recent horrific genocide and civil war. The Khmer Rouge murdered over two million of their own nation's people, and so it's rare to see an old Cambodian person around. Industry halted during the 70s and 80s, and now Cambodia is building its way into a modernized country. They have a long way to go...

The national currency in Cambodia is American dollars. Go figure. They only use riel, true Cambodian currency, for change. One dollar is around 4,100 riel. This pile of bills is about 70 cents:

Phnom Penh is Cambodia's capitol and our first stop. We arrived March 27th, or "Smiling Day" at the international airport:

https://www.facebook.com/cambodia.airports/photos/pb.550121325019933.-2207520000.1428029395./952497944782267/?type=3&theater

(I'm a finalist!)

Cambodia is the only place I've been where you can see a single motorbike with up to eight living human beings riding it at once-- the equivalent of a clown car, but on two wheels.

Underloaded bike. Photo Credit: http://www.parish-without-borders.net/cditt/cambodia/dailylife/2006/dailylifekh06.htm

The ballistic, unorganized manner of traffic is a defining characteristic of Phnom Penh. There are very few traffic lights, and they are seen as a suggestion at best; you can drive opposite traffic if you want; motorbikes hold whole refrigerators on their seats, secured by a single bungee cord; thirty-foot, sharp steel poles are transported on a motorbiker's shoulder (take extra care not to tailgate him); truck beds have mounds of whatever they're transporting, with an additional 15 people sitting on top. It's chaos.

We came to PP back in 2012 and did the depressing stuff — saw S21, the torture prison from the civil war, and the Killing Fields, where innumerable people were murdered — so this 2015 trip was determined to be lighter-hearted. We used PP as a pit stop to eat good food (some areas are majorly gentrified) and grab a bus to the beach.

Tuk-tuks are the taxis of PP. You can get just about anywhere for $3, but you HAVE TO HAGGLE. Some of the drivers are nice and helpful, others are not. Most are blind to the irony of asking if we want to see the killing fields and then go to a shooting range nearby, where we can shoot weapons identical to those used during the genocide. If you want to kill something, you're in luck! For $300 you can shoot a bazooka at a live cow, you sick fuck.

 

Unfortunately, PP is far from a safe place. Every legitimate hotel worker, tuk-tuk driver or restaurant employee will warn you to not walk with a purse, and signs about purse-snatching are abundant. There are a few red-light districts, and some statistics report up to 40% of Cambodian sex workers have AIDS. Drugs are everywhere and bad meth (i.e. ice/yaba) is a problem in the country. Little kids are known for pick-pocketing. Pretty much... watch your stuff, don't hire hookers and don't do drugs. Be vigilant.

See the warning?

During the day, you can visit two different markets: The Russian Market is an unorganized, hot and dirty market where you can get cheap souvenirs. It's home to trinkets, silk scarves, shirts that say "No Money No Honey", and an impressive wing of hardware supplies.

I found this guy from his "Best Iced Coffee" page on Facebook

Central Market is a more organized market under a beautiful dome. The main dome has tons of jewels (some real some fake, all priced as real), and you can find "higher-end" items and souvenirs here: nice clothes, suits, custom made shoes, electronics, etc.

Because a lot of Phnom Penh was built under French Indochinese rule, there are some seriously gorgeous French-inspired buildings and walkways near the city center. Preah Sihanouk Boulevard, leading up to the Palace, is a romantic park and recreation area with fountain shows and organized workout groups every night. 

The Independence Monument is also worth a look.

 

At night, a walk along the river on Preah Sisowath Quay is always interesting. Start at the Palace and walk north to the Night Market. One side of the street is lined with restaurants and bars, and the other is a long, narrow park, where families play and groups workout. It's especially seedy in this area. "You wanna smoke, brudda? Weed, mushrooms, opium?" -every tuk-tuk driver to Ian. Oddly, no one offered me anything. AM I NOT COOL?

Night Market

Palace

A fake monk grabbed Ian's hand, tried to "bless him" by alternating taps between his forehead and Ian's, similar to a frat bro handshake mixed with some hokey pokey. Then he slipped a bracelet on Ian's wrist and asked for money. Real monks don't beg to foreigners or sell anything or have any use for money. For shame!

We were happy with our three days in PP, and we were all ready to get to Sihanoukville, until our good friend Food Poisoning came to visit. Sigh. We stayed a few more days.

We initially stayed at Rambutan Resort, which is super swank. We had a private outdoor bathtub, huge room and bomb ass breakfast included. Get the eggs benedict.
 

Rambutan was a little expensive ($60/night) to stay for longer than a few days, so we switched over to Hotel 240 ($40/night). Hotel 240 is on street 240, which rules because tuk-tuks know how to get there. It is very close to the Palace, River Walkway, markets, parks... basically everything. We booked through Agoda and got a great deal. Breakfast included. Private swimming pool. Bam. (The uneasy comfort of colonialism comes cheap in Phnom Penh.)

We felt better (and skinnier) after the food poisoning, so we continued on to Sihanoukville. (See next post!)

"What should our password be?"

"What day is it?"

"Well, yesterday was Wednesday, so today must be... Sursdey."