Chiang Mai, D20: 6.5-Hour Jungle Trek

I think we were still jet-lagged when we booked a private 6 to 7-hour hike in the jungle, but nevertheless we did.

We’re told to meet outside of our guesthouse at 7:30AM. I set the alarm at 7 and spend 7-7:30 telling myself I can do this; engagement is temporary and if I’m a little bitch on this hike I could be left in the jungle forever. Game face is on. 

We meet a lady outside who tells us “You go with driver to jungle to meet my brother. My brother Jungle Man!” 

Ok, awesome. “Jungle Man” is taking us hiking in the jungle.

An hour ride later we’re in a small village at the bottom of some rolling hills. This is our stop! We meet Jungle Man, who looks less like Mowgli and more like a twenty-year old ready for his day in the city. He has on long cargo pants and a sweater. It’s 8:45 and I’m wearing a sheer tank, athletic shorts and a sweat mustache.

Jungle Man’s name is Kam and to our surprise he’s 39, not 21! The jungle does a body good. His English is a little more limited than most of our guides so far, but he's good enough to converse. I asked how he had learned English in the jungle and he said he took classes and has been a tour guide for three years now. Ian asked if he liked being a tour guide to which he replied by laughing and saying NO in such a way that I was sure he understood the question. (We probably won’t start off other adventures asking the workers if they like their jobs... hard to bounce back from that.)

Right off the bat I ask Kam what kinds of animals and insects we’re going to be dealing with here. (I only had an inch-thick layer of SPF50 and citronella-mix on me, and I was more than willing to apply more.) He said that most of the animals are deeper in the jungle because it’s dry season. It’s unlikely we'd see any wild elephants or tigers this time of year. Not assured. Snakes? "Nothing poisonous... except maybe King Cobra."

Kam seemed a little reserved but warmed up throughout the trek. A few times it seemed like he was actually trying to ditch us, but Ian’s been almost ditching me on hikes since the summer of ’13; I was ready! 

We walked uphill in the jungle for three hours. We passed little villages about every 30 minutes. The villages would pop out of nowhere. Everyone knew Cam and spoke with him. They looked at us but weren’t very interested. Ian distinctly heard a woman call one of us a ladyboy, so we argued over who we thought she was talking about. (I was wearing a hat with my hair tucked under and Ian is just pretty. It’s a tossup.)

We passed by/underneath a few waterfalls on the way up:

 

We arrived at a village that hosted an elephant camp. Kam chopped up a watermelon and we had Pad Thai in banana leaves waiting for us. Ian bought his brother something from the local giftshop to support small business. It was lovely!

On our way out of the village Kam grabbed some bananas and fed a baby elephant. The elephant gave Ian a kiss on the face and on the shirt. 

 

Curious Elephant ~ Elephant Print on Ian's Shirt

This is really where Kam seemed to warm up. I think we were ahead of schedule so he started to show us cool things in the jungle. He picked fruits and had us try them. He pointed out ginormous spiders that he considered very small. He told us that in the jungle they grow or hunt everything they eat, and they trade with others. They drink from a small creek. They eat the BIG spiders. Big spiders? He points to a hole in the ground my fist could fit in, stuck a stick inside, but thank goodness the spider didn’t want to come out. I have enough nightmares, thank you!

 

The way back down from the jungle was not the same way up. This way seemed way less-travelled. There were leaves hitting me at all angles and I kept tripping on loose vines on the ground. We truly would have benefited from having a machete. This was the most difficult part for me, as traversing down became just a series of me falling and catching my balance right before doom. (Doom being sharp drop-offs and more spider holes.)

We walk across logs and jump down big rocks and make it to a waterfall. Kam tells us that we are only ten minutes away from the end of the hike. Time to celebrate! He told us we could swim in the water and I at first declined because it was butt-cold. Then Kam showed us that we could glide down the rock formations with the current to ride down the little waterfalls. I was sold!

Kam washed his hair in the water and we all dried off. Two ladies were weaving silk with looms. We’ve seen silk scarves at virtually every market in Thailand, so it was really cool to watch the process. We bought a blanket, table runner and scarf from them, and we didn’t negotiate because the ladies were real jungle people and we thought it was best that they benefit from the money. I think they enjoyed that transaction very much, because they then gave Ian and me private scarf-making lessons. We sucked and I am positive they had to redo the parts we worked on.

The last ten minutes of the hike is a very easy path- it looks like people come up this way to the waterfall often. There’s even a huge wooden bridge. We walk through some rice fields and Kam gives us high-fives. His buddy is waiting for us to drive back to Chiang Mai. We did it!